新高考英语作文续写

浙江新高考英语作文指津

专题一读后续写

[ 选材特点 ]

1．所需阅读的短文词数在

350 以内；

2．多以记叙文故事类文章或者夹叙夹议类文章为主，故事情节有曲折、有起伏，但是，故事线索的逻辑性比较强。

[ 评分参考 ]

阅卷时主要考虑以下内容：

1．与所给短文及段落开头语的衔接程度；

2．内容的丰富性和对所给关键词语的覆盖情况；

3．应用语法结构和词汇的丰富性和准确性； 4．上下文的连贯性。注意：

1．所续写短文的词数应为 150 左右；

2．应使用 5 个以上 (即至少 6 个 )短文中标有下划线的关键词语； 3．续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好；

4．续写完成后，请用下划线 (单下划直线即可 )标出你所使用的关键词语。 [ 写作步骤 ]

1．精读文章，确定文章线索，如是以时间为线索还是以空间为线索等，这有利于“顺藤摸瓜”。

2．仔细审题，明确续写要求，如字数限制、使用几处下划线关键词语、续写段落的首句提示等，做到“心中有数”。

3．回扣原文，想象续写内容。快速回读短文，揣摩文章的思路，结合段首的提示语和划线词语提示，确定续写段落的内容。

4．拟写草稿，修改错词病句。结合提示语和文中划线的关键词拟写出草稿，注意句子结构的多样性，语言的丰富性，上下文的衔接。

5．标出所使用的原材料中标有下划线的关键词语，最后誊写文字时，务必做到“字迹工整、清晰”。

[ 方法技巧 ]

1．在读懂原文的基础上，紧扣原文中心，以原文的结局为起点，写出故事情节的发展和变化。

2．对原文故事没有写出的情节展开合理的推想，打开思路。多角度地想象出几种情况或结局，并从中加以最优选择。

3．要注意前后照应，符合逻辑，防止自相矛盾。必须与上文紧密联系，使上下文融为一

体。

4．原文的主要角色，续文中都要安排“戏”，但不要引进影响事件结局的新角色。 注意确保四个一致：

1．要与原文的主题或作者的本来意图保持一致。

2．要与原文的体裁、结构、写作手法保持一致。 3．要与原文的语言特点和叙事风格保持一致。

4．主要人物的思想行为、性格特点要与原文保持一致。

[ 写作要求 ]

阅读下面短文，根据所给情节进行续写，使之构成一个完整的故事。

A funny thing happened to Arthur when he was on the way to work one day.As he walked along Park Avenue near the First National Bank，he heard the sound of someone trying to start a car.He tried again and again but couldn't get the car moving.Arthur turned and looked inside at the face of a young man who looked worried.Arthur stopped and asked，“ It looks like you've got a problem，” Arthur said.

“I'm afraid so.I'm in a big hurry and I can't start my car”.

“Is there something I can do to help？” Arthur asked.The young man looked at the two

suitcases in the back seat and then said，“ Thanks.If you're sure it wouldn't be too much trouble ， you could help me get these suitcases into a taxi”.

“No trouble at all.I'd be glad to help.”

The young man got out and took one of the suitcases from the back seat.After placing it on the ground， he turned to get the other one.Just as Arthur picked up the first suitcase and started walking ， he heard the long loud noise of an alarm．

It was from the bank．There had been a robbery(抢劫 )!

Park Avenue had been quiet a moment before.Now the air was filled with the sound of the alarm and the shouts of people running from all directions.Cars stopped and the passengers joined the crowd in front of the bank.People asked each other ， “What happened？” But everyone had a different answer.

Arthur ， still carrying the suitcase，turned to look at the bank and walked right into the young woman in front of him.

She looked at the suitcase and then at him.Arthur was surprised“. Why is she looking at me like that ？” He thought.“ The suitcase！ She thinks I'm the bank thief！”

Arthur looked around at the crowd of people.He became frightened， and without another thought， he started to run.注意：

1．所续写短文的词数应为

150 左右；

2．应使用 5 个以上短文中标有下划线的关键词语； 3．续写部分分为两段，每段的开头语已为你写好； 4．续写完成后，请用下划线标出你所使用的关键词语。

Paragraph 1：

As he was running，Arthur heard the young man shouting behind，“ Stop，stop！”

Paragraph 2：

The taxi stopped in front of the Police Station and Arthur

【经典范文】 【范文一】

As he was running，Arthur heard the young man shouting behind，“ Stop， stop！” And also at the moment，Arthur suddenly realized that the young man might be the bank robber．So Arthur didn't stop，but continued to run until he saw a taxi.He stopped it ，jumped in with the suitcase and said to the driver，“ Go to the police station ， please.The man shouting behind is the bank thief ！” The taxi raced away like the wind.

The taxi stopped in front of the Police Station and Arthur told the police what had

happened.Obviously，the police had already learned about the robbery．They opened the suitcase and there was a large sum of money inside ， as Arthur had expected.Then the police asked Arthur to describe the young man and the other suitcase.Later，with the information ，the police caught the robber.The police and the bank both thanked Arthur a lot.(Words：153)

【范文二】

As he was running ， Arthur heard the young man shouting behind，“ Stop， stop！” Thinking of the way the young man had behaved ，he realized the young man might be the bank robber． So Arthur ran faster and stopped a taxi.The moment he got into the taxi ，he told the driver the man shouting behind was the bank thief and asked him to drive to the nearest police station.The driver followed what Arthur said and drove away.

The taxi stopped in front of the Police Station and Arthur thanked the driver and directly went in.Just as Arthur was describing what had happened near the bank on Park Avenue and reported the young man to the police，he heard a voice outside，

“ Help！Help！” To the surprise of Arthur ，it was the young man.He had followed Arthur in another taxi.It turned out that the young man was innocent and inside the suitcases were just some clothes.Arthur felt embarrassed but the policemen thanked him anyway.(Words：158)

专题二概要写作

写概要时，读者要把文章的具体信息用一些具有概括功能的词和句表述出来，而不是抄

袭文章的原句，更不是把细节性信息作为中心，而是要通过对文章中的单词、词组和句子进 行合理转换，对文章的具体信息进行概括，再用合适的语言表述出来。 [选材特点 ]

1．所需阅读的短文词数在 [ 评分参考 ]

阅卷时主要考虑以下内容：

1．对原文要点的理解和呈现情况；

2．应用语法结构和词汇的准确性；

350 以内；

2．所选材料体裁没有限制，以说明文、议论文和记叙文为主。

3．上下文的连贯性； 4．对各要点表达的独立性情况。

注意：理解准确，涵盖全部要求，完全使用自己的语言，准确使用相应的语法结构和词汇，得分相应比较高。相反，如果概要写作部分出现两句以上整句抄

自原文现象，得分档次将会大大降低；所写内容与所提供内容无关不得分。

[ 写作步骤 ]

1．仔细阅读原文，掌握文章的主旨大意。在阅读过程中，要注意搜寻要点，如议论文中的论点、论据，记叙文中的发展、高潮、结局等。

2．列出文章的要点和各段落的主题句。可以用下划线标记，也可做笔记，将要点逐一列

出。

3．分析原文的内容和结构，将内容分项扼要表述，并注意在结构上的顺序。

4．写出初稿。根据列出的要点和对原文的理解，用自己的语言组织内容，尝试写出概要。

5．修改、定稿。认真阅读初稿，对照原文，检查是否漏掉重要内容。检查并确定拼写、语法、标点正确无误。检查是否符合规定的词数要求。

[ 方法技巧 ]

在掌握一定的解题步骤后，为了顺利完成概要写作，学生在写作时还需要注意以下方法技巧。

1．要点齐全。概要写作主要考查学生概括文章主旨大意和准确获取关键信息的能力，关键信息获取不准确往往导致所写概要要点不齐全。要点全面是评分的重要方面，因此学生要训练自己的语篇能力和阅读能力，既把握文本的整体和部分又把握它们之间的逻辑关系。

2．精练简洁。精练指的是概括的内容要高度浓缩。学生可以利用概括的方法对文本内容进行提炼，用删略的方法去换不重要或者不必要的细节。简洁指的是所使用的语言简练。学生可以用抽象的、概括性的语言代替具体形象的语言。

3．灵活转换。语言转换就是用不同的词或句式来表达与原有表达内容相同的意义，且重新表达后能做到简单易懂。灵活转换包括语言换说和句子重构。语言换说可以通过同义、近义和反义变换来替换需要被替换的词汇；句子重构可以改变原有句子中个别词和词组在句子中充当的语法成分或变换句式来实现。

注意确保四个一定：

1．一定要使用第三人称。 2．一定不可加入自己的观点。 3．一定不可对原文内容加以评论。

4．一定不要引入与原文内容无关的信息。

[ 写作要求 ]

阅读下面短文，根据其内容写一篇

60 词左右的内容概要。

Getting rid of dirt ， in the opinion of most people， is a good thing.However，there is nothing fixed about attitudes to dirt.

In the early 16th century，people thought that dirt on the skin was a means to block out disease，as medical opinion had it that washing off dirt with hot water could open up the skin and let ills in.Aparticular danger was thought to lie in public baths.By 1538，the French king had

closed the bath houses in his kingdom.So did the King of England in 1546.Thus began a long time when the rich and the poor in Europe lived with dirt in a friendly way.Henry Ⅳ， King of France， was famously dirty.Upon learning that a nobleman had taken a bath，the King ordered that ，to avoid the attack of disease，the nobleman should not go out.

Though the belief in the merit (好处 ) of dirt was long-lived ，dirt has no longer been regarded as a nice neighbor ever since the 18 century.Scientifically speaking， cleaning away dirt is good to health.Clean water supply and hand washing are practical means of preventing disease.Yet， it seems that standards of cleanliness have moved beyond science since World War

Ⅱ .Advertisements repeatedly sell the idea： Clothes need to be whiter than white ， cloths ever softer， surfaces to shine.Has the hate for dirt，however，gone too far?

Attitudes to dirt still differ hugely nowadays.Manyfirst - time parents nervously try to warn their children off touching dirt ，which might be responsible for the spread of disease.On the contrary， Mary Ruebush，an American immunologist ( 免疫学家 )， encourages children to play in the dirt to build up a strong immune system.And the latter 后(者 ) position is gaining some ground.

【经典范文】

People have mixed opinions about dirt on our skin.(要点 1)For a long time in history ， people of some European countries believed that dirt protected people from getting ill.( 要点

2)However，people began to change their attitudes towards dirt about 200 years ago.People have been told that washing dirt off our body can keep us healthy.要(点 3) Yet，some scientists believe that exposure to some dirt may help our immune system要.(点 4)

【范文点拨】 (一)要点分析

1．文章第一段就是本篇文章的主题句，亮明了总的观点：“

However，there is nothing

fixed about attitudes to dirt. ”换句话说： “ Different people have different attitudes towards dirt. 再结合下文谈到的主题可知 “Different people have different attitudes towards dirt on the skin. 范文中的要点 1“People have mixed opinions towards dirt on our skin概.括非常精练”。 2．第二段主要谈到了在 16 世纪，人们认为 “ dirton the skin was a means to block out disease 尤”以英、法两国的贵族为代表。结合第三段第一句“ Though the belief in the merit( 好 处 ) of dirt was long- lived ，dirt has no longer been regarded as a nice neighbor ever since the 18 century.”可知，直到 18 世纪之前，人们都认为 dirt 是很“友好的”，有助于预防疾病。范文中的要点 2“For a long time in history， people of some European countries believed that dirt protected people from getting ill”. 很好地总结了这些要点。

3 ． 第 三 段 用 “ Though”引 出 人 们 对 dirt 观 点 的 转 变 “...since the 18th century.Scientifically speaking， cleaning away dirt is good to health.”再结合本段最后一部分 “ Advertisements repeatedly sell the idea...可得出要点 ”3“ However ， people began to change their attitudes towards dirt about 200 years ago.People have been told that washing dirt off our body can keep us healthy”.

4．文章最后一段第一句指出，现在人们对于 dirt 的态度还是有所不同，“ On the

contrary”引出专家的观点，一位免疫学家认为 dirt 有助于增强免疫系统。这一观点得到了

一些支持。范文中的要点 4“Yet，some scientists believe that exposure to some dirt may help our immune system.”表达很恰切。

(二)要点连接

文章概要，在写完了要点之后，下一步的工作就是要把这些要点用适当的连接词进行连

接，使上下句之间具有连贯性。本篇文章整篇结构是总分结构，要点 2 和要点 3 在观点上截然相反，因此，两者之间需要表示转折的连接词，范文用了 “However”恰到好处。要点 3 和要点 4 在观点上又存在不同，因此，范文用了连接词 “Yet。”

专题三应用文写作

类型 1|

书信 / 电子邮件

英文书信通常由下列五个部分组成：

1．信头 (Heading)。包括写信人地址和写信日期，通常写在信笺的右上角。在比较熟识的朋友之间的通信，写信人的地址常可省略。

2．称呼 (Salutation)。指写信人对收信人的称呼，如

顶格写，称呼后面可用逗号，也可用冒号，一般用

Dear Xiaojun ，写在日期下一两行，

Dear...或 My dear... 开头。

3．正文 (Body)。这是书信的主体部分，即写信人要表达的内容。正文一般在称呼下方

隔两行处开始写，正文的首行左边一般留约 5 个字母宽的空白。

4．结束语 (Complimentary Close)。它是书信结尾的恭维话，相当于中文书信最后的“祝好”、“致礼”之类的话语。如“ Best wishes 等”。

5．签名 (Signature)。签名通常签在结束语下方的中间偏右的位置，在签名的上方可根据写信人和收信人的关系写 Sincerely yours/Yours sincerely(用于长辈或朋友之间 )，或 Respectfully yours/Yours respectfully(用于对长辈或上级 )，注意开

头字母要大写，末尾要用逗号。

假如你叫李华，你的一位朋友 John 刚从国外归来，邀请你参加本周日在他家举办的朋友聚会，但你不能参加。请你根据以下要点给他写一封电子邮件：

1．表达想参加的意愿； 2．忙于准备高考；

3．由于感冒，身体不适； 约时间。注意：

4．表示歉意并另

1．词数 80 左右；开头和结尾已给出，不计入总词数； 2．可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯；

3．参考词汇：高考 the College Entrance Examination [ 习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文

Dear John，

I am extremely sorry to tell you that I am unable to go to your party this Sunday.

It is very kind ①for you to invite me to your house and I look forward to ②go to your party and ③ share your experiences abroad. To my regret，I will ④ absent from your party

because⑤ of the College Entrance Examination is just around the corner，and I am now really

1.避免搭配错误 ①

把 for 改为 of 2.杜

绝语法错误

② go 改为 going ③ share改为 sharing ④添加 be 动词 ⑤删除介词 of ⑥把 prepare 改为

preparing

busy ⑥prepare for it.What's worse，I

⑦改为现在完成时 have ⑦ caught a bad cold lately and I am really

caught not myself.

Anyway ， we ⑧ have many more chances to get ⑧改为一般将来时 will have

3.要点一定不要遗漏 补

上⑨处要点： Shall we

together.⑨ ( 让我们把时间定在考试之

make it after the exam？

后行吗？ )I am truly sorry and hope you will accept my apology. I'm looking forward to your reply.

Yours，

Li Hua

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈进

Dear John， I am extremely sorry to tell you that I am unable to go to your party this Sunday. It is very kind of you to invite me to your

1.高级词汇 在⑥处加入适当过渡 词 What's worse

house and I①

look forward to

going to your party and sharing your ② experiences abroad.

2.高级句型 把④改为 with 复合 结构： with the

College Entrance Examination just around the corner

把⑤改为介词＋关系代词引导

③ to my regret， I will be absent

from your party ④ because the College Entrance Exam ination is just around the corner，⑤ and I am now really busy preparing for it.⑥ ，I have caught a bad cold lately and I am really not myself. Anyway ，we will have many more

chances to get together.Shall we make it after the exam? I am truly sorry and hope you will accept my

的定语从句： for which I am now really busy preparing

3.一定的修辞意识 在下面标号后写出相应的修饰词

① really

② happy

③Much

⑦ sincere

⑦ apology.

I'm looking forward to your reply.

Yours， Li Hua

类型 2|建议信

1．写作目的： 建议信的写作目的是提出建议或忠告，观点要合情合理，注意礼貌当先。 2．写作方法 (1)首段：

a．简介自己，不要啰嗦； (2)主体：

a．提出具体建议；

b．首先肯定优点，再写需改进内容，否则变成投诉信； c．经常进行交流，注意对方感受，时时提升你和我，否则容易跑题写成议

b．说明目的，注意语气。

论文，因为内容与议论文相似。

(3)尾段：总结建议，注意礼貌，盼望回复。

假如你叫李华，你的英国朋友 Andrew 下个月要来你校学习两个月。他来信请你对他上学期间的交通方式提出建议。现在，请你用英语回一封信，按以下各点答复：

1．建议骑自行车上学；

2．自行车是学生常用的交通工具；

3．骑自行车的一些好处； 4．骑自行车需注意的问题。注意：词数 80 左右。 [习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文

Dear Andrew，

As for the question about the transportation to and

from school，I'd like to recommend your riding ① bicycle.Here are some reasons. ② ( 骑自行车上、下学在学生中是很常见的。 )As is well- known， buying or repairing a bicycle doesn't cost a lot.And parking a bicycle is easy in our

school.Bicycle-riding is also a way to do ③exercises and protect the environment.What you should do

④careful is just to keep an appropriate speed while

riding and lock it after you're off it. ⑤By this way ，

1.避免词汇搭配错误

④处 careful 改为 carefully ⑤处 By 改为 In 2.杜绝语法 错误 ①处添加冠词 a

③处 exercises改为 exercise

⑥处 relax 改为 relaxing

要点一定不要遗漏

you'll feel it simple and ⑥relax to ride a bicycle while you're here. Hopefully ，these tips could be helpful.

3.

补上②处要点： Riding a bike to

and from school is very

Yours sincerely， common among the students.

Li Hua

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈进

Dear Andrew，

As for the question about the transportation to and from school， I'd like to recommend your riding a bicycle.Here are some reasons. Firstly ，① riding a bike to and from school is very common

among the students，for buying or repairing a bicycle doesn't cost

1.高级词汇 ②convenient ③Actually/As a matter of fact ④practical 2.高级句型 用 it is

common

practice to do...

改写句①加黑

a lot.Next，parking a bicycle is easy and② our school.③

(便利的 )in

(事实上 )，bicycle- riding is also a ④

(实用的 )way to do exercise and protect the environment.What you should do carefully is just to keep an appropriate speed while riding and lock it after you're off it.In this way ，you'll feel it simple and relaxing to ride a bicycle while you're here.

Hopefully ，these tips could be helpful.

Yours sincerely，

Li Hua

部分： it is

common

practice for the

students to ride

a bike to and

from school

类型 3|申请信

1．申请信的写作要求

(1)应符合英语信件的格式，表达方式符合英语习惯；

(2)申请人的语气要自信而不傲慢，礼貌而不卑微，即不卑不亢，恰如其分； (3)应写得简明流畅，言简意赅。

2．申请信写法：

开头：说明写信目的 (申请原因 )，信息来源，对所申请工作或学校的认识，

自己的打算。

主体：着重介绍自己的背景 (教育情况，工作经历，兴趣爱好，特长等 )。求职信先介绍工作经验，要突出个人能力及工作业绩；求学信要重点介绍自己受教育程度。总之，要努力使自己的介绍引起对方的兴趣。

结尾：表达自己的愿望，如希望得到面试机会等，语气要自信而坚定。

假如你是我市一名高三学生李华，你打算报考一所外语学院。你在网上看到上海外国语学院的招生信息 (admission information)，并对此非常感兴趣。根据招

生要求，你需要用英语撰写一份个人申请报告，内容应包括：

1．记述自己的个性特长及取得的成果； 2．说明进入大学后的努力方向及设想等。

词数： 80 左右。 [ 习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文

Dear Sir or Madam，

I read about the admission information while I ① am surfing the net the other day.I'm interested in it.

For one thing，I can get on well with all my

classmates.For another，I do well in ② my most subjects，especially in English.I like reading

English poems and③ enjoying English

1.杜绝语法错误

①处 am 改为 was

③处 enjoying 改为 enjoy ④处 deliver 改为 delivered ⑤处添加连词 and

movies.Speeches，④ deliver by famous people are also my favorite.I once won the first prize in an English speech contest held in our city⑤ was honored the Best Speaker for my performances. English is so important to me that I intend to learn English ⑥ (如果我被您的大学录取 )．I

want to have a job ⑦relate to languages in the future.

⑦处 relate 改为 related 2.要点一定不要遗漏

补上⑥处要点： if I am

admitted into your university

3.规避中式英语 ②处“我的

大部分学科”应准确表达

Li Hua

I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon. Yours， 成： most of my subjects

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈进

Dear Sir or Madam，

I read about the admission information①while I was surfing the net the other day.I'm② interested in it.

1.高级词汇

在③处加过渡词

What's more

⑤ major in

For one thing， I can get on well with all my classmates.For another， I do well in most of my subjects，especially in English.I like reading English poems and enjoy English movies.Speeches, delivered by famous people are also my favorite③. ，I

2.高级句型 把①改为省

略句： while

surfing the net the other day

3.强烈的修辞意识 根据语境写出相应的修

once won the first prize in an English speech contest held in our city and was honored the Best Speaker for my ④ performances.

饰语

② really/quite

④ excellent/outstanding

English is so important to me that I intend to⑤ ( 主

修 )English if I am admitted into your university.I

want to have a job related to languages in the future. I'm looking forward to hearing from you soon.

Yours， Li Hua

类型 4|邀请信

1．邀请信是邀请亲朋好友或知名人士、专家等参加某项活动时所发的邀约性书信。在国际交往以及日常的各种社交活动中，这类书信使用广泛。

2．一般邀请信具有简短、热情的特点。格式一般为： (1)说明与收信人的相关性与写作意图；

(2)具体交代情景：包括受邀请的人，邀请朋友干什么、地点以及具体的时间等内容。并且强调为什么邀请收信人而不是别的朋友；

(3)表示期待朋友的回复。

假定你是李华，你所在的学校将在暑假期间举办“澳大利亚文化展览”。请你根据以下要点给澳大利亚朋友 Peterson写一封信，请他届时前来给你们做一次

讲座。

目的：帮助师生了解澳洲历史与文化内容：简要介绍澳大利亚的风土人情日期： 8

月第一周内任意一天的下午时间： 3： 00—5：00，约两个小时注意：可适当增加细节，以使结构完整，词数 80 左右。 [ 习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文

Dear Peterson，

Our school is planning to hold an① Australia culture exhibition in ②summer vacation.I'm writing to invite you to come and give a talk on the people and③custom on the continent of Australia. It will help our teachers and students learn more about your history and ④cultural.You may choose

1.避免搭配错误

①处 Australia 改为 Australian

③处 custom 改为 customs

④处 cultural 改为 culture

any day of the first week in August.You can give us 2.杜绝语法错误 the talk that afternoon，⑤ that will start from 3: 00

②处添加冠词 the

p． m.and finish at about 5：00 p． m.⑥

⑤处 that 改为 which 3.要

(请让我尽可能早的知道，以便于我及时作出安

点一定不要遗漏

排)

补上⑥处要点： Please let

I am looking forward to seeing you and enjoying the talk. me know as soon as

Yours， possible so that I can make

arrangements in time.

Li

Hua

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈进

Dear Peterson，

Our school ①is planning tohold an Australian 1.高级词汇

用 schedule 的相关短语改写 culture show this summer vacation.I'm writing to

invite you to give us a lecture about the people and ① 处 的 黑 体 部 分 ： is

customs on the continent of Australia.

②We would like to get our teachers and

students to learn more about your history and

scheduled to

culture.You may choose any day of the first week in August and give us the talk that afternoon，③ which will start from 3 ：00 p． m.and finish at about

2.高级句型

用 It is a good chance for sb.to

5： 00 p．m.

I'm looking forward to your reply and we're sure your talk will be a success. 定语： starting from 3：00

Yours， p．m.and ending at about 5：

Li

00 p． m.

Hua

do sth.改写句②： It is a good chance for our teachers and students to learn more about your history and culture. ③处改为现在分词短语作后置

类型 5|求助信

1．求助信要简明扼要，语气委婉、真诚，不强人所难，并尽量提供足够的信息，能使收信人愿意帮助你。

2．写作指导

(1)清晰陈述请求的内容或所要获取的信息； (2)提出的问题数量不宜过多，要便于回答；

(3)解释收信人回信的理由并表示感谢。

假如你是某中学的高一学生李明，最近与母亲关系紧张，难以相处。请根据下表内容用

英语给某英文杂志 Helper 栏目的编辑 Mr.Smith 写一封 80 词左右的求助信，请他帮你解决问题。

你的情况

1.学习成绩好； 2.爱母亲；

3.有点害怕母亲。

你母亲的情况

你的问题

1.与母亲很少交 流；

不知如何沟通。

2.

1.大学教授，工作勤奋，很 少有时间和你说话； 2.对你 严格要求，易发脾气。

[ 习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文 Dear Mr.Smith，

1.避免词汇搭配错误 ④处 in 改为 with 2.杜绝语法错误

①处 troubled 应改成 troubling

②处应添加冠词 the ③处应添加连词 and ⑤处 easy 改为 easily ⑥处 exchange改为 exchanged

3.要点一定不要遗漏

补上⑦处要点： I'd appreciate

I am writing to tell you my problem ①

troubled me for a long time.It is ②relationship between my mother and me.

My mother is a university professor ③she

works very hard.She is strict④ in me but she is so busy with her work that she finds little time to talk to me.I love her and I do well in my studies，but I still feel a little afraid of her because she loses her temper⑤ easy.I don't know how to communicate with her.

Maybe it's because we have seldom sat down it if you give me a way out. and ⑥exchange our feelings and thoughts⑦. (如果您能帮助我，我将不胜感激。 ) Best wishes.

Yours

sincerel y， Li Ming

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈进

高级句型

①处改为定语从句：

which/that has troubled me for a long time

②处改为现在分词短语： working very hard

③ 处 改 为 倒 装 句 ： so busy

is she with her work that

Dear Mr.Smith，

I am writing to tell you my problem ①troubling me for a long time.It is the relationship between my mother and me.

My mother is a university professor，② and she

works very hard.She is strict with me but③she is so busy with her work that she finds little time to talk to me.I love her and I do well in my studies，but I still

feel a little afraid of her because she loses her temper

she finds little time to talk

easily.④I don't know how to communicate with her. ⑤Maybe it's because we have seldomsat down and exchanged our feelings and thoughts.I'd appreciate it if you give me a way out. Best wishes.

Yours sincerely，

Li Ming

to me

用 the reason why...is

that...连接④、⑤句： The reason why I don't know how to communicate with her is that we have seldom

sat down and exchanged our feelings and thoughts.

类型 6|感谢信

1．感谢信是重要的礼仪文书，是向帮助、关心和支持过自己的集体或个人表示感谢的专业书信，有感谢和表扬双重意思。

2．感谢信的写作格式主要分以下三个部分：

(1)开头部分要明确对对方提供的帮助或赠送的礼物表示谢意；

(2)主体部分则需列举对方提供的帮助，说明该帮助所起的作用，或表达对所收礼物的喜爱以及以后如何使用及收藏等； (3)结尾部分需再次表达诚挚的谢意并问候对方。

假如你是一名失学儿童，名叫李华，你有幸得到在中国工作的

Mr.Brown 的

资助，可以重返校园。请你给

Mr.Brown 写一封信，内容如下：

1．收到钱和书后能重返校园，非常感激；

2．在老师的帮助下，学习有了很大的进步，受到老师的表扬和鼓励； 3．决心更加努力学习，取得更大的进步； 希望他寄来一张照片。 注意：

1．书信应包括以上所有要点，可适当增加细节，以使行文连贯； 2．词数 80 左右；文章开头和结尾已给出，不计入总词数。 [ 习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文

4．盼望见到 Mr.Brown ，

Dear Mr.Brown，

I am writing to express my deepest gratitude for the money and books you sent me①.I could not return to school if you hadn't helped me.Thank you so much.

I have been②work hard since I went back to school.I have made great progress in my studies ③ under the help of my teachers.They often praise me and encourage me④.Imade up my mind to study harder and make⑤ great progress. How are you getting on with your life and work？ I would like to meet you in person，but I have no opportunity to do so.⑥ (您能寄给我一张自己的照片吗？ )

1.避免词汇搭配错误③处 under 改为 with ⑤处 great 改为 greater 2.杜绝语法错误

①处 could not return 改为 could not have returned ②处 work 改为 working ④处 made 改为 have made

3.要点一定不要遗漏 补上⑥

处要点： Would you please send me a photo of

Thank you again for your generous help and best wishes！

Yours sincerely，

Li Hua

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈

yourself？

进 Dear Mr.Brown，

I am writing to express my deepest gratitude for the money and books you sent me.I could not have returned to school

① if you hadn't helped me.Thank you so much.

1.高级词汇

①处改为“ without

I have been working hard since I went back to school②.My 2.高级句型 teachers often praise me and encourage me③.I have made

用“介词＋关系代 great progress in my studies with the help of them.I have

made up my mind to study harder and make greater progress. 词”连接②、③句：

How are you getting on with your life and work ？I would like My teachers often

praise me and to meet you in person，but I have no opportunity to do

encourage me， so.Would you please send me a photo of yourself？ Thank

with the help of you again for your generous help and best wishes！

whom I have made Yours sincerely，

Li Hua great progress in

my studies.

＋名词”形式：

without your help

类型 7|通知

1．通知分书面通知或口头通知。它是上级对下级、组织对成员部署工作，传达事情，召开会议所使用的一种文体。 2．英文书面通知的格式与写法

通知正文上方的正中位置写上 NOTICE( 每个字母用大写 )，出通知的单位写在正文结束后的右下角，或者写在 NOTICE 的正上方。出通知的日期一般写在左下角。单位和日期两项也可以省略。通知不写称呼，也没有结束语，但在正文里，往往首先提到被通知的对象。通知的正文就是通知的内容，这是主体部分，包括通知的对象、事由、时间、地点等，语言应简洁明了，条理清晰，要求明确，特别是时间概念很重要，必须写得十分明确，不容丝毫含糊。

请你根据以下内容，以学校的名义写一则书面通知。北京大学将于

10 日在北戴河举办英语夏令营，以下是课程及活动安排。

上午：英语口语，美国文化讲座。

下午：爬山，游泳，做游戏。

7月 25日至 8月

晚上：英语晚会，唱英语歌，演话剧，有时看英语录像 (English videotapes)。有意者请于 6 月 20 日至 6 月 24 日到教务处报名、登记。日期： 2017.6.11

NOTICE

[ 习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文

杜绝语法错误

An English summer camp is going to ① hold in Beidaihe by Beijing University from July 25 to August 10. In the morning，spoken English and some lectures about American culture ② is arranged.In the afternoon，

students are going to take part in some activities such as climbing mountains， swimming，and playing games. In the evening，English ③ activity will be held ，④ which students will sing some English songs，and put on some English plays.⑤ (有时看英语录像。 )

1.

①处 hold 改为 be held ②处 is arranged改为 will be arranged ③处 activity 改为 activities

④处 which 改为 where

⑥ 处 wanting

want 改 为

2.要点一定不要遗漏 补

Those ⑥ want to go should come to register from June 上⑤处要点：

20 to June 24， in the Teaching Affair Office. Sometimes they can

Beijing University watch some English

Jun.11，2017 videotapes.

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈

进 NOTICE

①An English summer camp is going to be held in

Beidaihe by Beijing University from July 25 to August 10. In the morning，spoken English and some lectures about American culture will be arranged.In the afternoon， students are going to take part in some activities such as climbing mountains， swimming，and playing games. In the evening，English activities will be held ，at which students will sing some English songs，and put on some English plays.Sometimes they can watch some English videotapes.

②Those who want to go should come to register from June

高级句型

用 there be 句型改写 句

①： There will be an English summer camp in Beidaihe by Beijing University from July 25 to August 10.

用 whoever 改 写 句 ②：

Whoever wants to go

should come to 20 to June 24，in the Teaching Affair Office.

register from June 20 Beijing University

Jun.11， 2017 to June 24，in the

Teaching Affair Office.

类型 8|演讲稿

英语演讲稿实际上是属于一种特殊的说明文或议论文，其基本组成部分是： 1．开始时对听众的称呼语。如 ladies and gentlemen，fellow students， distinguished guests，Mr.chairman，honorable judges(评委 )等等。

2．提出论题。由于演讲的时间限制，必须开门见山，提出论题。

3．论证。对提出的论题，不可主观地妄下结论，而要进行客观的论证。这是演讲中最需要下功夫的部分。关键是要把道理讲清楚。

4．结论。结论要简明扼要，以给听众留下深刻印象。

5．结尾。结尾要简洁，不要拉拉扯扯，说个没完。最普通的结尾就是： Thank you very much for your attention.。

你校将举办“我为自己感到自豪”的演讲比赛，请用英语写一篇演讲稿，包 括以下内容： 1．简单介绍自己的性格； 2．记述一件或几件自己引以为豪的事例；

3．自我认识。注意：词数 80 左右。 [ 习作评阅 ]—— 自我修改三档作文

Good morning，ladies and gentlemen！

I am an easy- going and optimistic girl.I'm not a top student ① and I'm happy and full ② with confidence.Now I'll tell you why.

As a child，I ③ show an interest in painting.With my parents' support and encouragement， I have been practicing drawing with joy and ④ my painting makes progress every day.Now I am a designer for blackboard and wall newspapers of our class.

I usually send nice postcards made by myself⑤ for my friends and relatives.They are glad to accept my gifts，⑥ I am proud of them.

I'm sure everyone is special and unique in the world.Let's be proud of ourselves！ Thank you.

[ 自我提升 ]—— 向极优作文迈进

1.避免词汇搭配错误 ②处 with 改为 of ⑤处 for 改为 to 2.杜绝语法错误 ①处 and 改为 but ③处 show 改为 showed

⑥处需要加并列连 词 and

3.规避中式英语 ④ 处为中式英语，应 改为 I make progress in my painting

Good morning，ladies and gentlemen！

Here，① (在你前面站着的是一个随和、乐观的小女孩 )． I'm not a top student but I'm happy and full of confidence.Now I'll tell you why.

1.高级词汇 在③处加过渡词 Besides2.高级句型用倒装句式补全句①： in

As a child， I showed a ② interest in

front of you stands a girl ， easy- going and optimistic

在④处添加“介词＋关系代词”以构成定语从

painting.With my parents' support and encouragement，I have been practicing drawing with joy and make progress everyday.Now I am a designer for blackboard and wall

newspapers of our class③. ，I usually send nice

postcards made by myself to my friends and relatives. They are glad to accept my gifts，④ I am proud.

I'm sure everyone is special and unique in the world.Let's be proud of ourselves！ Thank you.

句 of which

3.强烈的修辞意识②处在 interest 前面加表示程度的修饰词

great

附录：作文中常用连接词的选择

表示【强调】的连接词

still, Indeed, apparently, oddly enough, of course, after all, significantly, interestingly, also, above all, surely, certainly, undoubtedly, in any case, anyway, above all, in fact, especially. Obviously, clearly. 表示【比较】的连接词 like, similarly, likewise, in the same way, in the same manner, equally.

表示【对比】的连接词

by contrast, on the contrary, while, whereas, on the other hand, unlike, instead, but, conversely, different from, however, nevertheless, otherwise, whereas, unlike, yet, in contrast.

表示【列举】的连接词 illustrate.

for example, for instance, such as, take ...for example. Except (for), to

表示【时间】的连接词

later, next, then, finally, at last, eventually, meanwhile, from now on, at the same time, for the time being, in the end, immediately, in the meantime, in the meanwhile, recently, soon, now and then, during, nowadays, since, lately, as soon as, afterwards, temporarily, earlier, now, after a while.

表示【顺序】的连接词

first, second, third, then, finally, to begin with, first of all, in the first place, last, next, above all, last but not the least,

first and most important. 表示【可能】的连接词 presumably, probably, perhaps. 用于【解释】的连接词 in other words, in fact, as a matter of fact, that is, namely, in simpler terms.

表示【递进】的连接词

What is more, in addition, and, besides, also, furthermore, too, moreover, furthermore, as well as, additionally, again.

表示【让步】的连接词

although, after all, in spite of..., despite, even if, even though, though, admittedly, whatever may happen.

表示【转折】的连接词

however, rather than, instead of, but, yet, on theother hand, unfortunately. whereas 表示【原因】的连接词 for this reason, due to, thanks to, because, because of, as, since, owing to.

表示【结果】的连接词

as a result, thus, hence, so, therefore, accordingly, consequently, as

consequence.

用于【总结】的连接词

on the whole, in conclusion, in a word, to sum up, in brief, in summary, to conclude, to summarize, in short.

其他类型连接词

Mostly, occasionally, currently, naturally, mainly, exactly, evidently, frankly, commonly, for this purpose, to a large extent, for most of us, in many cases, in this case,

祝你成功！